Disliking the United States is the new black

The New York Times reports that other countries view the United States less favorably today than they did in 2002. One might speculate this is because of the war in Iraq, or hatred of George W. Bush, but that's just the most obvious explanation. Let's look at some of the countries with the highest change and see if we can figure out exactly what's going on:

Great Britain (75 % favorable in 2002, 51 % today): They're angry that we stole David Beckham, and The Office. I can't blame them, The Office is hilarious and Beckham is a gorgeous man.

France (62% to 39%): They still haven't gotten over Freedom Fries and Freedom Kisses. Until we get another Jerry Lewis, we can pretty much forget about this country.

Poland (79 % to 61 %): Since 2002, Polish jokes are up 21 %, which has not been good for our numbers. And we "forgot about Poland" in the 2004 presidential debate.

Japan (72% to 61%): Let's see, we're buying Toyota cars more than we're buying from GM, people can't get enough of the Wii, Ninjas are hot, we paid a Japanese baseball team $50 million just to negotiate with Dice-K, what else do they want? I'm sorry, but I can't figure this one out, maybe they were upset about Pearl Harbor? (deservedly so, that movie was unwatchable)

Germany (60% to 30%): This was the biggest dropper (besides Indonesia, but I can't even locate Indonesia on a map, so I'm not going to count it). Wait a minute Weimar Republic, so you think our leader is invading too many countries? Killing too many people? Trampling too many human rights? This is like the pot calling the kettle Hitler. If Bush grows a little moustache, wins re-election with 123% of the vote, invades French Guyana, and starts selective breeding country music fans, then maybe, just maybe Germany can disprove of the United States. Worse case scenario, we're on the First Reich, still two away from the indefensible Third Reich. What happened to three strikes you're out? On second thought, I just remembered this:
For the uninitiated, that's German Chancellor Angela Merkel getting the most awkward back massage ever. OK, I'm sorry, I take it all back, every person in the World not living in the United States has a reason to dislike us. I think this picture just about sums it up. That, and Crocs:
If I were living Europe, and I saw an American tourist wearing these god-awful ugly shoes, I would lose all respect for Americans, too. If anyone reading this actually wears these shoes in public please send an email to mcfors@Gmail.com and defend yourself. I would sooner grow a mullet, put on some faded denim jean shorts, a fanny pack and a Members Only jacket than ever put these on my feet. (Thanks a lot, Colorado, please stick to the skis and stay out of the ugly footwear division).