If you have been reading any newspaper or watched any news on TV, or been to any news sites on the web in the past week, you probably know the disgusting Mark Foley story. And for those of you have a strong stomach, you may have seen the actual IM conversation between former Congressman Mark Foley and a 16 year-old boypage. So we will not overdo it here at premaritalsax and spend a lot of time rehashing what the professionals have already done. Instead, let's take a closer look at what does this mean for the involved parties? Fire up the Sax Updater!
Republicans: Obviously not good news. They have done in 2006 what no party has since the Whig Party in 1852: they have reached the glorified trifecta of scandal-making: money, racism, and sex. And not just premarital sex, and not just homosexual sex, but premarital, homosexual, underage, creepy sex. Could it get any worse for the party of "morals" in Washington? Well, the fact that the leadership knew about it and did nothing, in spite of Foley's leadership role on a committee in charge of the protection of children from internet predators leads many to question GOP leaders such as Hastert and Boehner. The Religious Right are going to have second thoughts about coming out to vote, and as that is the GOP's most reliable base, this could reverberate in other districts throughout the country.
Ex-Rep Mark Foley (R-FL): The man was living a lie for years and meticulously protected his privacy. Now the whole world knows his perverted ways, in full, gruesome detail. A public shaming, yes, but the only silver lining for him is he now can stop living a lie. He is a gay man, with obvious issues. Unfortunately for him, I don't believe anyone has started a Pedophiles Annonymous group yet. But perhaps NAMBLA is looking for new members?
Florida's 16th District: The Fighting 16th! Foley's homosexuality was apparently one of the worst-kept secrets in the district, but you voted for him, anyway! Way to go! I sure hope you didn't send any of your bright-eyed, wet-behind-the-ears sons to be a page for him. Just another feather in the cap of the state of Florida.
Joe Negron: Congratulations! You get a chance to take over Foley's 16th District! Not only that, but in a cruel twist of fate, it is too late to replace Foley's name on the ballot, so in order for Negron to receive a vote, the voter must physically vote for the disgraced pedophile and have the votes awarded to Mr. Negron! These are the same voters who had trouble with butterfly ballots. Good luck, Joe! I would hold off on those Craigslist housing searches for just a little while.
Democrats: No news is good news for you, boys. Turns out, you do not have a monopoly on the gay vote. But don't worry, 4 years from now when you control all the branches of government again there will be plenty of time for scandal.
White House Interns: Congratulations to you, too! You no longer are the most publicly mocked and disgraced position in American politics.
So that conlcudes the Sax Take. Until the next time a Republican screws up and the media circles like vultures and we pile on, vaya con dios.
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